News of the Right

gyrovague

Thanks for the word, Mace!

Fantastic Four: True Story #1: According to this month’s solicitations, one should expect that





which is so frenetic of language it couldn’t be outdone. Right? Oh, so very wrong. Scroll a little further down the page and one finds:





They come on a little strong, don’t they? While I can’t speak to the content of True Believers, I can for True Story. Was the title oversold? The package more delightful than the present? Most definitely. The idea is a good one (in a Gaiman-after-an-all-night-bender kind of way), but the execution of the characters by Cornell (Reed saying that reading Sue’s word balloon was “cool”? Unlikely.) and the uneven artwork of Domingues (it got better by the end, except for Sue’s hair) has a lark-y quality that doesn’t fly very gracefully nor very far before falling to Earth. D+ (Werd to Joveth for the solicitation info.)

Thor #10: I said I wasn’t going to pick up this issue, but with the opening pages set in Kansas (the part of the MJS’s plot I’ve found to be most winning), I forewent my resolution and was thrilled to find the plot was not as same same same as I had thought it would become. Loki, no longer the “god of lies” (and per se, no longer a god), is now a messenger of truth, but as any bridesmaid confronted by the question “Do you like the dress I picked out for you?” knows, the truth can hurt. A

Justice Society of America Annual #1: I don’t typically follow the JSA, but with all the anticipation surrounding this issue and what it means for Final Crisis (if anything) and Power Girl (a lot), I forked over my $3.99 and discovered a title I’ll be adding to my regular pull list. Dammit. My only fear is that there will never be a definitive answer to “Who is Power Girl?”, just an end to the story arc. Bonus: Helena Wayne as The Huntress. A

In other news:

Orson Scott Card calls gay marriage “the end of democracy in America”, but he’s not a homophobe (much like Dave Sim isn’t a misogynist). No, no. Paranoid science fiction writer living in a paranoid world? Yeah, I’ll buy that. AfterElton.com reacts.

Also from AfterElton.com, an editorial about the new X-Files movie. I haven’t seen it myself and before I comment I will be sure to. My only complaint (SPOILER ALERT!): no aliens!!!!

Finally, from Fanboys of the Universe via Joveth, a marvelous kiss:

The last real chance I had to be on stage was in the redemptive role of Puck in A Midsummer Night’s Dream my last semester of college, sadly turned down because I was too busy finishing school to dedicate myself to a full-on Shakespeare play. Now I’m busy teaching college and writing and… ok, generally doing fuck-all with my summer break, but that will end soon enough. And the only equity I concern myself with is my house’s. So, acting has become a fond reminiscence for me in these, my non-staged years, a thing of the past.

Then I saw this:

Audition notice for Night of the Living Dead
Posted: July 14, 2008

Weird City Theatre Company will be casting for their upcoming LIVE stage performance of George Romero’s classic, Night of the Living Dead. Auditions will be held at the Dougherty Arts Center, located on 1110 Barton Springs Road in Austin, on Monday August 4th starting at 6:00PM. An appointment is required. Please e-mail weirdcitytheatre@gmail.com to set up an appointment.

We are seeking a diverse cast that is familiar–if not hardcore fans–of the original film and the genre. Rehearsals will take place Monday –Thursday evenings beginning September 1st. Performances will be the final two weeks of October at Hyde Park Theatre. All positions are voluntary and no compensation is available. Please do not audition if you are obligated to another commitment.

Contact: Weird City Theatre Company weirdcitytheatre@gmail.com

Why not? Am I doing anything else?

UPDATE: I have an audition!!!!!!!

ananias

A long-lost copy of the complete Lang opus Metropolis has been found in Argentina!!!!

Hummer owners really are arrogant assclowns.

Brave police officers taze 13-year old boy with broken back nineteen times for not complying to their authoritah.

“Talula does the Hula from Hawaii”, 9, given new name by judge. Really, I couldn’t make the headline funnier if I tried.

Apollo 14 astronaut claims aliens have made contact with world governments; the Disclosure Project says, “Told ya so!”

Andrew Giuliani sues school over golf suspension. Claims he’s a hero of 9/11 and should be reins… oh wait, that was his father.

Florida Catholics lovingly threaten USF student after he takes Eucharist “hostage.”

bromide vs. blatherskite

First, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Right. Better now. On to the comics!

Madame Xanadu #2: Matt, you’ve restored my faith in your story-telling abilities. Don’t screw it up. A+

War Heroes #1: Have you ever ridden cross-country on a bus, surrounded by soldiers on holiday leave? I have, and, Deity love the troops, but I think half of them are insane or at least in desperate need of some reality therapy. Maybe some estrogen just to take the edge off. Seriously. I heard one guy give the most earnest account of how he had been stationed at Area 51, how it was all hush-hush and “every fucking thing you ever thought about that place is real, man!” at the top of his lungs. I’m not saying he was representative of the troops in general, just of the ones who take buses cross-country (how I wish he had been the only soldier of that kind I’ve met). Mark Millar seems to share my opinion. His war heroes are not noble nor are they caught in a situation of their control; they are in the war for the glory and the power. I fear Millar may be saying something about our broader culture - lionizing the troops and the war while we give up privacy and the safety of our children. The story is hardly nuanced, but it is intriguing. And condemning. A (it would have been an “A+” but Millar really needs to stop writing closing letters in his comics. He looks like a self-obsessed maniac.)

X-Men #500: Besides this being an historic moment for Marvel Comics, there had to be several reasons to publish this story. I’m guessing the primary reason was to completely undermine the premises Warren Ellis built in Astonishing X-Men #25, to say nothing of Simone’s designs. New place to live (and it’s GREEN. there’s lots of to do about how GREEN the new X-mansion is, to the point where Hank calls Logan “that awful little Canadian” for his non-GREEN, smog-loving ways). New costumes. New plot that has nothing to do with Ellis’ plot though the cast is exactly the same. And this “new plot” is depressingly old: Sentinels and Magneto? “Mutie” haters? Oh, dear. I know I’ve said 100 times before that I long for a return to the old days of comics, but I meant good writing, interesting stories, characters I can relate to, not actual old stories. Speaking of the Claremont Hole, Nightcrawler appeared out of nowhere! I know that’s his power, but he wasn’t shown as being a member of the team, in the SF area or even near the X-mansion, yet - BAMF! - he gets one word and one panel of face time, then falls back into the event singularity. Also, no less than three times did someone comment on the spectacular views of SF then completely fail to show us said views. It’s an anniversary issue: go crazy with the page count! And Greg Land, step away from the lightboard and take a drawing class. This kind of over-the-top reaction to the mayor of San Francisco’s stance on the First Amendment





is best left to posturing for an enemy who’s actually trying to kill the X-Men. F-

And a special “Thanks, rotten orange!” to Joveth for mentioning me and Frater Mine at the Prism Emerging Voices panel at Comic-Con. Shout outs are always welcome and very cool. Let me know when you do one and I’ll send you a McDonald’s gift certificate.

medectophobia

Helen Killer #3: What could be more damaging to the reputation of the sainted Helen Killer than to portray her as a whore? And while one is at it, why not put the image on the front cover of a comic book? Oh, the joy of iconoclasm! In the most over-the-top issue so far in a series that was halfway to the moon to begin with, Helen goes under-the-covers to scare up anarchist Elisha Grey in this penultimate chapter of the series. A+

1985 #3: Like Secret Invasion, 1985 is halfway done and there’s not a shred of evidence that the plot is going anywhere. Like Toby and his Dad’s encounter with Modok, there’s no urgency in the tale (really, that was the slowest getaway scene since Tuistas‘ interpretation of Esther Williams in a Richard Donner film). The surreal “now you see ‘em, now you don’t” of heroes and villains adds to mystery of the tale (the Big Questions being “Why are only villains popping into this world? (yeah yeah, there was the Hulk, but in 1985 he had been a full-fledged hero for, what, 20 minutes?)” and “What’s their Evil Agenda?”), but doesn’t take time to clue the reader in. I like how the Hulk and Juggernaut disappeared from Toby’s life because that seems to be the way real life would work: a chance encounter with a hero, before normal life takes over again (contrasted with the narcissistic “Rick Jones’ Method of Injecting Oneself into a Hero’s Life. Forever.”). However, I don’t like how they disappeared from the story (known as “Falling into a Claremont Hole”). I’ll glance at the next issue, but I’m thinking this is the one where I get off. D

Five things you need to know about The Dark Knight:

1. Christian Bale is an excellent Bruce Wayne, but his Batman needs a lozenge.
2. I’ve never seen the Joker as a violent sociopath, but more as an annoyance. Then Heath Ledger came along.
3. This is the first time ever that a villain team-up made sense in a movie.
4. Listen for the words “need”, “want” and “deserve”. They will tell you everything you need to know about the plot.
5. The secondary cast members give performances just as demanding as the lead actors. Blink and you’ll miss Anthony Michael Hall.

Of course, the word on every comic geek’s lips this weekend is “Watchmen”, since the full-length trailer debuted in front of The Dark Knight. I’m embarrassed to admit that I’ve never read the graphic novel, and will probably be fined for saying so. I’ll have to pick up a copy and finish is before the poseurs do. I hate being in the middle of a phenomena.

Mattel crossed a line for some people by releasing the Black Canary Barbie, a tartier version of an already loose doll. The odd thing is, I really can’t find any original complaints online, just an article in The Sun that says people are upset.

OMG EEEEEEE Joss Whedon’s superhero musical “Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog” starring Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Filion is online for this week only before going for sale on iTunes. I’ve always had a crush on Nathan Filion, but I fear that he’s been ousted from my heart by NPH. Of course, he’ll have to share space with Rick Schroeder, and ya know, should… anything… happen there while they’re… ya know, waiting for me… like a pillow fight in their underwear, then, uhm…. yeah, I’d be cool with that.





Best line: “The hammer is my penis.”

metafiction

The script for Frater Mine #8 (”The Knights Come Riding”) was finished this just past weekend and already my brother has the cover ready to go!

Though, like the cover for issue 7, I have no idea why he’s supranumerated (if such a word exists) the issue. Ah well. I’ll blame it on the summer.

RAS syndrome vs. tautology

The BFF and I got our picture in the Austin American Statesman for going to the 100th Guerrilla Queer Bar event. Looks like we’re famous (yet, oddly, still single).

From Captions & Balloons, comes the next comic I can’t wait to read, Jesus Hates Zombies:

(via Chris’ Invincible Super-Blog)

Michael Chabon wrote an article for the New Yorker entitled “Secret Skin”, linking fashion and superhero costumes.

greedy bottom vs. power bottom

Wonder Woman #22: I’m not much for dream sequences because they’re never handled well (the exception being the “Restless” episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer), though in this issue Gail Simone certainly has the surreal overlapping of times and places down pat. This seems like a long way to go just to reintroduce some of DC’s old 1970’s characters, especially because they’re “not real”. I think. I’m really hoping for Beowulf and Claw pop into the real world to help Diana fight the Devil. Stalker’s really real, so why not them as well? Best line of the book: “Warmongering succulent!” A

Secret Invasion #4: Punch shoot punch shoot. Repeat. Secret Invasion is becoming less and less expansive each month and more and more pointlessly violent. I get that it’s a war and violence is part and parcel therein, but it feels unimportant. Each panel that shows someone getting the tar beaten out of them is one panel not dedicated to plot. As with Final Crisis, I look to Crisis on Infinite Earths as the gold standard of events. Why not pack each page full of battle and discovery and paranoia? Why have the heroes in the Savage Land been chasing Empress Spider-Woman around uselessly for half the story? She’s not trying to hide and from all indications she’s undefended and slow-moving. This may be the last issue for me. C-

Final Crisis: Requiem: I read Requiem in the comics store and was touched by the story, but I refused to buy it in protest for the shabby and ignominious way in which J’onn J’onzz was dispatched by the powers-that-be at DC. I know that every ….Crisis at DC requires casualties, and the editors pick their victims for shock and awe value, but I don’t see why it had to be J’onn, especially since I don’t think he’ll stay dead long. C’mon, when he telepathically contacted all his friends, different parts of their faces were subverted by his. I see a Wrath of Khan resurrection coming up which makes me more grumpy than the death in the first place. I’m really hoping that Final Crisis resets all of the DCU so the stories can be finally unburdened by years and years of bizarre continuity. Sadly, with the main titles barely even mentioning the current Crisis and Trinity only a few weeks into its year-long run, I don’t see that happening. I guess I can look forward to being surprised by Grant Morrison’s next several issues.

Other News: Witchblade: the Complete Series will be available July 29, 2008. Even better, Friday the 13th: the Series will be available September 23, 2008. I loved these shows and cannot wait to possess them on DVD!

Comics Should be Good has an exhaustive list of Comic Book Urban Legends which, in addition to their regularly expansive articles, will cost you hours and hours of productivity to get through (they’re nearing 200 stories as I write this). Celebrity porn for the comic book set.

Brian Andersen of So Super Duper fame has a new comic book coming out: Reignbow and Dee-va which he’s hoping to finish up in time for Comic Con. He’s been nice enough to send along a few preview pages. Click to see the full-sized images.













Finally, Claymation seems to be a theme in my life this week (maybe the Universe was prepping me for the opening sequence from Hellboy II), begun by the following two videos. I try to avoid posting from YouTube because one never knows how long the videos will be available for, but I’ll make an exception here. The first is from a dark “children’s” movie called The Adventures of Mark Twain; anyone remember this from their childhood? The second is Primus’ cover of “The Devil Went Down to Georgia”. Funny, but one of these days, someone has to give Johnny’s reels a bump up to the truly ecstatic. Frankly, had I been judging, the Devil would have won.









Happy Saturday!

From Accordion Guy comes news of The Map of Humanity, a stellar (or terran, but better) piece of para-cartography by comic creator James Turner. Click on the map above for a substantially larger view, and click on Accordion Guy’s link above to read more about it.

I’m wondering who I can sell to get me one of these mounted and framed. For those heading to Comic Con, you can get them at the SLG Publishing booth (#1815).

Thanks to Joveth Gonzalez for the heads up!

UPDATE: MY BROTHER GOT ME THIS FOR OUR BIRTHDAY!!!!!

pomosexual

From Scott McGrath and Juan Romera come images of Frater Mine #7, “Through the Wave that Runs for Ever”. At the end of issue six Matt, Mark and Colleen became fugitives from the law. With so much at stake, why does a fuzzy magical bunny take center stage in issue 7?

UPDATE: Oops! The cover says it’s for issue 8, but it’s really for issue 7.

pannapictagraphist

Astonishing X-Men #25: Warren Ellis and Simone Bianchi take over for Whedon and Cassady and actually make changes to the X-Men (the most prominent and well-advertised of which is their move to San Francisco)! The dialogue is banterful and the watchword for the series is “CSI”. My only complaints are Armor (she’s the latest ingenue? Ugh. Hardly a worthy successor to Kitty or Jubilee) and her tiresome “make me and X-man” paean; the clunky depictions of Ororo (the Julie Taymor-inspired headdress can hardly be aero-dynamic); and the dark, muddy colors (seriously. Hold the issue at arm’s length and page = my cake in MacArthur Park). B+

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season Eight #16: Yay seeing Fray again! Yay Dawn as a centaur! Yay Kennedy and Willow! Yay Kennedy threatening Buffy! Yay getting back to the Big Bad for the series (finally!)! A

Manhunter #32: As ever, Manhunter stands free from the “events” twisting the DCU inside out this year (though the subplots bump into Batman’s and the Justice League’s Big Players), and she’s doing just fine without that mess because she’s already in plenty of trouble. What I like most about Manhunter is that it’s free to develop interesting plots and relationships that don’t need to be reconciled to 70+ years of baggage. I see folks have been accusing Marc Andreyko of pushing his liberal agenda in this arc, but the questions are “is this a problem if the story is set in El Paso?” and “Is Kate herself is a liberal?”; I mean, she hunts down criminals and has killed several of them during her time as a hero. Is this liberalism? Conservativism? Anarchism? A+

Billy Batson and the Magic of Shazam #1: I wanted to like this series, especially after the enjoyable Shazam and the Monster Society of Evil, but I’m still a bigger fan of the classic Shazam! Family stories from the 70’s. It’s a cute comics, but Captain Marvel is just a Billy Batson in a bulkier body, unlike Smith’s version which showed them as two separate personalities (they could even talk to each other). After the horribly odd and poorly-paced Trials of Shazam! and the ridiculous abuse of Mary Marvel in Countdown, I wonder if anyone knows how to write these characters well. C+

Heresy #1: It took me three reads to get into the story of Heresy mostly because of the art. Not that the art is hideous or anything, but the photo-realistic style makes it difficult to distinguish one dark-haired guy from another; luckily, the dialogue repeats the characters’ names enough times that I was able to sort out who was who before I lost interest, which would have been a shame. It’s a mystery story, so not everything is revealed at once, but what we learn connects post-Tsar Russia with a modern experiment with (I’m guessing) reanimated tissue. Pre-order at Ape Entertainment. B+

Stephen King’s The Stand: While not available until August, I got a sketchbook of the adaptation this week. The art looks good, but I’m always wary of adaptations; they never seem to carry the tone of the books through them, which should be the easiest thing on the world to do with the right artist. Look at Gaiman’s Neverworld comic or The Dresden Files - the artists were completely wrong for what the books are about, to say nothing is the useless and distracting the extra-textual material that took away time from actual textual material. I’m not saying this is the case for The Stand, but my first red flag (hee hee, pun) went up when I saw the nuclear explosion on the cover.

The Columbus COSI is not only host to the inordinately fun CSI: The Experience, but also to a GIGANTIC skeleton (click for the full effect):

According to COSI representitive, Claire Paul, the skeleton is

A sculpture by Tim Rietenbach, an associate professor at the Columbus College of Art & Design. Originally funded from an individual artist grant from the Ohio Arts Council and created for Springfield Museum of Art. This skeleton is 100 feet long, 30 feet higher than the COSI Atrium. It was constructed from fifty rolls of 14-gauge fencing material weighing approximately 1,500 pounds.The skull itself is 11 feet high. Installation of GIGANTIC at COSI is made possible through financial support from: The Greater Columbus Arts Council, The Columbus College of Art & Design. Installed at COSI July 2003.

I was thrilled to see both while in Columbus this past May. I can’t wait to get my nephew there to play.

galdoring