That’s My Bag
Wonder Woman #25: It seems that even in Gail Simone’s world a Wonder Woman movie is not meant to be. However, unlike the comic movie which “lacks a proper second act” (my favorite line of the whole book), the conclusion to this arc is proper and exciting every step of the way. No one can balance all out action with beautiful little human moments like Gail Simone can. A+
Superman #680: “Happy.” A+
Secret Six #2: I’m just flat-out embarrassed for Catman. God love Gail Simone for trying to give him a sense of dignity, but he’s Catman, a rip-off of Batman so painfully obvious that he resists pride. I’ll give her this: she didn’t retcon him into a cool costume or a better origin, as is the DC way of late. However, she left him with the impression that he’s Batman’s arch-nemesis. Those other guys, “petty little psychos who [Batman has] made into celebrities”. Catman goes so far as to say “One day, we’re going to kill each other, aren’t we?” But I think it’s this level of self-delusion that I like about Catman; the same way I like the damage of the rest of the Secret Six. They’re badasses, but they’re also completely fucked up. A+
Legion of Three Worlds #2: OOOOoooh that Superboy-Prime is in dire need of that spanking I spoke about last issue. Lightning Lad agrees with me, as do most of the 31st centurians; Superman is the only hold out for a happy morally high-grounded ending. I honestly have no idea which way Geoff Johns will go by the end. I’d hate to see another “death in the DC”, but an “I love you, Willow” probably won’t eke out the requisite cleansing rehabilitative tears. Funniest moment: the bickering Brainiac 5 triplets. A+
Final Crisis: Revelations #3: Revelations ties with Legion of Three Worlds for the strongest titles of the whole Final Crisis extravaganza. I wasn’t impressed at first, but now I can’t believe the ideas that are coming up, particularly the idea that God has abandoned His creation and left it in the hands of Evil at the end of the world. I imagine for people who see 2008 as the threshold for the Last Days, that God has indeed abandoned them. Every day, I read about how Christians feel under attack from the liberal media, Islamic extremists and teh homosexual agenda. Poor things. I prefer to think that maybe we’ve outgrown that God and are moving to a place where Justice and Mercy don’t have to flow directly from Him, but stem from each of us individually. At least I hope so. Anyway, that was what I got out of this issue. A+
Runaways #2: There is a lot going on in this book for it being two issues old – an alien attack, a job for Chase, an alleged suicide attempt, new digs. It seems Terry Moore is setting up stories for the next three years, which I wouldn’t mind if it means he’s sticking around for that long. I love his Nico. I’m not sure how it does it, but her face is more cartoony that everyone else’s yet, she doesn’t stick out like Roger Rabbit. Xavin is like the clown fish of Runaways . S/he isn’t funny-ha-ha, but she can switch genders as the situation needs. This issue sees her (typically) masculine side coming out to threaten Karolina’s Majesdane attackers. But something was not sitting right with Karolina in terms of Xavin. I didn’t finish Whedon’s Runaways, though I’m not sure Whedon finished Whedon’s Runaways, so it’s possible something damaged their relationship or maybe Karolina mistrusts Xavin’s clown fishiness. Whatever the reason, it was a moment of sadness in the book. A-
Astonishing X-Men #27: Given what Warren Ellis was doing last month with The Boys, I feel this month’s X-Men to be a bit of a trap. Maybe Ellis is starting to fall into the groove of the Whedon legacy, but this is the guy who brought us Planetary and Transmetropolitan and Desolation Jones and I doubt he’s suddenly learned how to be cute. Not that he isn’t talented enough to find the cute voices in him, but he’s getting into Buffy levels of banter here. Frightening. I also think he and Brubaker are in a competition to up the ante for how sexually charged each issue can be. This month’s round goes to Ellis because bestiality (or “xenophiliac experimentation” as Agent brand puts it) always wins. My theory on this is that he has a deal with Grant Morrison to write comics that are too accessible and too inaccessible respectively and see how far their fans go to defend their writing as “cutting edge” and “metatextual” and “brilliant”. Honestly, I can explain this issue any other way. B+
Uncanny X-Men #503: The X-Men are led a merry chase through downtown San Francisco by Empath, the most evil (if not the most flimsy) of all the late Hellions. If i didn’t hate this guy before, I do now, especially since he struck a low blow to Sam Guthrie (“Dead baby brother!”), who holds a special place in my heart as showing the first naked (male) New Mutant butt during my mid-adolescence. Action aside, Scott Summers honestly needs therapy. I mean, deep-down monstrously invasive therapy. Brubaker’s entry in his competition with Ellis has Emma in Scott’s brain playing Dungeon Mistress when they’re supposed to be doing reconnaissance and he doesn’t realize it’s not really Emma!. What the…? Did Luke and Laura ever go through shit like this? No. And they live in a soap opera. And, finally, I get what Brubaker is doing with his heroic bio-captioning, something I wasn’t all that enamored of because it was too clever by half UNTIL Pixie stabs Empath right through the thought-maker and her caption says “Megan Gwynn. Pixie. X-Man.” Then I got it, and now I love Pixie. She’s not Kitty Pryde, but she’s an armed and dangerous woman. A
