News of the Right

I’m getting behind in posting all my food porn here at Orthocomics (damn you for being so easy to post pictures to, Facebook! seriously. Wordpress need to step it up.), so here are several days with of food at once:

Poached Chicken Panini with a Yogurt Dill Dip:

Recent excursions into bread:









All of which were pretty yum. There are days when I wonder if I could go to culinary school…

Sort of. In getting ready for the new semester, I’m trying out new healthier recipes for lunch so I don’t have to subsist on hamburgers every day (which, while delicious, would be bad), so here are two experiments:

First, pan fried wheat noodles with tofu in a Dr. Pepper/soy reduction. Yesh, the Dr. Pepper isn’t too healthy, and it doesn’t do anything for the flavor other than add a bit of a caramel finish. I think I’d be better off using Sprinte or white wine the next time.

Next is brown rice risotto with veg. I completely understand now why risotto is such a delicacy: it took me and hour of constant stirring to get the rice cooked! However, it was totally worth the effort. Fresh lemon juice just before serving gives it a nice finish.





YUM!

…BREAKFAST CUPCAKES! They’re butter cupcakes with maple frosting and a sausage link on top.

Next: meatloaf cupcakes!

I LOVE Weird City Theatre, not only because I’m a company member and because next summer they’re doing a superhero play that I’m writing (!!!), but because they put on some innovative shows, and Hallowe’en is our favorite season. Last year, we did “Night of the Living Dead“, and this year WTC has adapted F. W. Murnau’s “Nosferatu” for the Austin stage (picture to come soon). Early reviews say it’s a hit, and I’ve been fortunate enough to house manage the show, and to provide concessions, particularly, Elvis cupcakes: banana cupcakes with peanut butter frosting and candied bacon. So far, people seem to like them.

Since I’ve been asked for the recipe, I’m going to post it here; however, I’m going to start with a disclaimer: these aren’t my recipes. I’m not even sure this is an original idea (I’m actually too scared to google it). The other day I was thinking about what would be a great treat for the show, and this came to mind.

Banana cupcakes:

* 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (spooned and leveled)
* 3/4 cup sugar
* 1 teaspoon baking powder
* 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
* 1/4 teaspoon salt
* 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted
* 1 1/2 cups mashed bananas (about 4 ripe bananas), plus 1 whole banana, for garnish (optional)
* 2 large eggs
* 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a standard 12-cup muffin pan with paper liners. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.
2. Make a well in center of flour mixture. In well, mix together butter, mashed bananas, eggs, and vanilla. Stir to incorporate flour mixture (do not overmix). Dividing evenly, spoon batter into muffin cups.
3. Bake until a toothpick inserted in center of a cupcake comes out clean, 25 to 30 minutes. Remove cupcakes from pan; cool completely on a wire rack.

Peanut butter frosting:

* 1/2 cup butter, softened
* 1 cup creamy peanut butter
* 3 tablespoons milk, or as needed
* 2 cups confectioners’ sugar

1. Place the butter and peanut butter into a medium bowl, and beat with an electric mixer. Gradually mix in the sugar, and when it starts to get thick, incorporate milk one tablespoon at a time until all of the sugar is mixed in and the frosting is thick and spreadable. Beat for at least 3 minutes for it to get good and fluffy.

Candied bacon:

1. Preheat over to 425.
2. Place bacon on a rack inside a cookie sheet and sprinkle liberally with brown sugar.
3. Bake until shiny and crisp (about 25 minutes)

Assemble all the parts. Try them at your next party and let me know how they go over.

This Winter Break i ate a lot of food that is not normally in my diet. A few days ago, my body staged a mini-coup to get me to stop eating, but until I had already had a hand in consuming this:

The pizza is a large pepperoni and mushroom from Two Friends Italian Market; the wings (from top center: Regular Hot, Hot BBQ, 24 Karat Gold, Jalapeno Teriyaki, Spicy Peanut and Shanghai Red) and deep fried pretzels are from Eli’s Tavern – still the best place for wings in the world as far as I’m concerned. Keep in mind this was for two of us – my brother and I, not a party as one might suspect. This was the latest in a long series of dietary abuses that had me in bed for over a day. Ah, but what a way to go! Sadly, I didn’t get a picture of the “Best Reuben in Erie” at McGarrey’s Oakwood Cafe. Next year.

I was overcome by traditional values this holiday and decided to bake cookies with my nephew and brother. This is them decorating the sugar cookies we rolled and cut out:





For a kid who doesn’t like to get messy, he got pretty messy. Oddly, he didn’t like any of the cookies we made (to eat), though he liked making them. Oh! And we made Venom gingerbread men. (Dominic’s favorite villain):





All-in-all, it was a wonderful holiday, but next year I’m going to add an all-you-can-eat salad joint to my list of places to go. It’s sad when a man can’t gorge himself of heavily sauced and deep-fried foods to his heart’s content anymore.

Thanksgiving today was a laid-back affair – just myself and the BFF. All in all, we had a lot to be thankful for this year – Chris got a promotion at work and I’m still following my love of writing. We have homes, food, family and friends. What else do we need?

Considering there was just the two of us, we had enough food for six people. The leftovers themselves will keep me from going to HEB for at least that long, I’m sure. By the end of the day, we were stretching, farting and contentedly whining, “I’m so fat!” The feast consisted of:

Moet and Chandon champagne;
(more…)

Alton Brown. A goof among men. Bill Nye the Science Guy of the Kitchen. And I learn at his knees.

I borrowed part of one of his recipes tonight to make myself dessert. He called it “bananas bruleé” and it’s so easy to make and damn impressive (uhm… yeah, I actually did this to make someone jealous, though I’m sure that didn’t happen). All you need is your favorite ice cream (Blue Bell’s Hot Fudge Sundae for me!), a burn-proof surface, a banana, sugar, a knife and a butane torch (I’m gay; of course I have a butane torch in my kitchen).

Cut the banana in half vertically then again down the axes of both halves, then pour a thin (or thick; it’s your ass, after all) layer of sugar on the flat surfaces.







Then take your torch to the sugar and burn it ’til it caramelizes (this is the fun/impressive part).









Give the sugar a minute or two to harden up while you scoop the ice cream into a bowl, then add the bananas in a decorative or suggestive arrangement. Top as you see fit (sadly, I was out of chocolate sauce and whipped cream. And cherries. And nuts. Really, I was lucky I had ice cream.) and make someone special happy (even if it’s just you).





YUM!!!

Eli’s Tavern at 1002 W 26th St, whose website I would link to if they had one, but they don’t because it’s a little hole-in-the-wall neighborhood bar in Erie, PA and needs to stay that way, serves the best wings I’ve ever had. And I’ve eaten a lot of wings in my day. They boast a menu of 47 different sauces and 12 dry rubs – some are much more successful than others, but in general, you can’t go wrong with any of them. The wings are meaty and juicy, the skin is crisp and snaps when you bite into it.

Dear lord, I’m so sorry I’m back in Austin. I’m hungry for these wings!!!!!!

My brother, his friend Michelle and I got wings from Eli’s two days before I left for Austin, and as you can see from the picture above, we got quite a bit – deep fried pretzels with jalapeño cheese, 20 regular buffalo wings, 8 teriyaki jalapeño, 8 hot honey and 8 24 karat gold (spicy mustard sauce). I also had two draughts of Yuengling at the bar while I waited for dinner to be made. All told, the bill was $32.

Gotta love a small town neighborhood bar! Get you some Eli’s next time you’re in Erie!!