I’m going to write this feature without referencing Calvin and Hobbes, because any comic with a put-upon daydreaming ten-year-old boy is going to call up the comparison (plus, everyone else who discovers this comic is going to say the exact same thing). So, let me say that for those who enjoy pre-adolescent (and at times rather dark) whimsy and have an affection for all things superheroic, then as fast as you can type the URL, get yourself over to SMASH, and let the stupendous wash over you. It kicks Kick Ass’ ass without breaking a sweat or breaking a skull open.

Last summer, I heard Maggie Gallagher say the most reprehensible and simultaneously twee-est (if I’m using the word right; it means “cutesy”, correct?) thing to ever come out of her voluminous pie hole: “Marriage is not a civil right. In fact, it’s a civil wrong.” Her ability to turn a phrase aside, Mags’ head should have by all rights exploded from just the uncut rage I was sending her way (to say nothing of the other people I’m sure were doing the same thing). Ah, “Scanners,” you disappointed me once again. So, what’s a guy to do?
Easy: write her as a blobby (well, “blobbier”) hulk with swaying tits in league with all the other hating low-lifes and get friends to help make it into a comic book.
I now present to you the fruits of our labor – Rise of the Pink Ninjas: A Gay Fantasia (click on the hate to get the fun):


Orthocomics is pleased to announce the release of our first ever NSFW comic by Sean McGrath and Jo Beth “Jesus” March, “Infinitesimal Situation at the Ultimate Wiggle Piggly”. While Jo Beth was unavailable for comment because she was dragged back to her Carmelite monastery by Mother Superior Vicious Claws of Jesus’ Undying Love, Sean was available to say, “Screw you, beret-wearing post-modernists!”
Early reviews have been overwhelmingly positive, saying “Yes, it IS totally NSFW, but it is also damn f-ing funny. What a great way
to start my day. LOL!!! Great work!”
“I had a ‘WTF moment.’”
“Please remember that while I love your work–you know I do–my sensibilities are a little different than yours. Some kind of rating code would be helpful, just so I know what to expect … ‘Adult themes’ are one thing; exaggerated full-frontal graphics are…another.”
“BRILLIANCE!!!”
“So deep…”
“[NSFW] or humourless sods – brilliant stuff. I love the Living Tribunal as a Norma Desmond draggie.”
and from Mishiko Kakasomething of the New York Times Book Reviewz we got “A joyous slap in the face by the giant schlong of satire!”
The entire comic book is available for download. It’s TOTALLY FREE and TOTALLY NSFW!!! Click on the the lordly graphic by Scott McGrath below to get your copy!

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2d. "Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed."
— G. K. Chesterton
Orthocomics is an indy comics studio that pulls talent together to create novel, thought-provoking comics. Titles currently on the market are Frater Mine the oh-so-tantalizingly-familiar Generic Goddess Coming soon: PRAXIS!!

(And we love our pets, too!)
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